31 - Several months later... (Side Two)

Side Two.

I should explain before going on. I’ve been thinking about this of late, and whatever I may say about being busy, and not having time for things like writing anymore, that isn’t true. I’m getting better at my job each day, I know that for a fact. And more skill always comes with more responsibility. And responsibility with stress. I am tired when I come home from work. It’s a time thing, a release thing. Doesn’t matter if I’ve had no classes in the day, or if it’s been packed. I will be tired by 4.15. And when I get home the last thing I want to do is more work! I wish I could say writing these things is an unmitigated joy, which leaves me inspired and fulfilled. It’s hard work. And it also takes place on a computer. You know, the place where my games live. Distracting stuff. But here I am, coffee in hand, giving this another crack. I have two hours, so there’s no excuse for not finishing.

There was also no excuse for not finishing NaNoWriMo either, I was told time and time again, and that…

I think I’d remember talking about the elementary music festivals. I don't, so I will. Each year it’s a bit of a competition between the bigger and the smaller, and the smaller comes out on top more often than not. But this year Steph and I knew more of what to expect. Tsukushi excelled themselves once again, with an ace set of performances across all six years. Particularly excellent was the recorder piece by the third years, which is always good. This year’s song was the main theme from Spirited Away, which was a real nostalgia trip as it had been Mononoke in my first year. Can we British kids pull of this sort of stuff? I don’t remember learning about harmonising, for sure. Also standing out was what I think must be the neighbourhood’s theme for this year, an old choral song called Furusato. Awesome stuff, real powerful emotion. The whole school sung that, and then the principal insisted that we, the audience, join in. I did my best, I’ll have you
  know, having heard the song a few times in rehearsal. Steph had the excuse that this was the first time she was hearing it. But the parents? Bunch of uncooperative losers. Barely a peep from them.

A few teary eyes in the sixth years’ final song, the music teacher’s among them. They held together well in the performance, but once the curtain was drawn it all came out. And me? Well, I blubbered like a baby. Steph thought it was very entertaining. Am I ashamed? No! I heard some kids sing a song about leaving home, and I cried and I am proud! Hear me?! PROUD!

Except… if I was this bad this year, how bad will I be next year, when it’s my last…?

Moving on, then. Koryo’s festival was a funny one. We turned up about ten minutes before the start, and were whisked into a beaurocratic rigmarole where we sign our names, and sign on behalf of the schools we represent (Represent? I represent myself!), and are then told we should have been here even earlier because the place is full. At which point the vice principal shows up and takes us on a thrilling tour of the plumbing works round the back of the school, and slips us into seats on the other side of a fire escape. Guest seating. Got to sit next to a teacher who’d left last year, which was nice.

But, and if this makes me sound ungrateful that’s too bad, I’m not sure I wanted guest seating. It beat standing, which the punters had to do, but me? A guest? I WORK here! This is where I work! I’m not a guest! Now, Steph WAS a guest, so that’s fine I suppose. But I didn’t really like being put on a pedestal like that. Not when I work with those kids as much as any of the poor teachers marching around the outside keeping everything in check. Put me to work! Don’t bundle me up in cotton wool and stick me in a corner to rise in value!

Alright, alright. I’m calm. Seems silly reading it back now. Maybe it’s indicative of something deeper in the old subconscious. Some deep-seated fear of the monarchy, or something.

The music, then. I was impressed more by this year than last year. Last year seemed a little all over the place, and each year group seemed to only get a tiny bit of time to perform their songs. And when the attention has to be split between over a hundred kids in each year group, it’s already a bit thin. But I think this year they came into their own. Third years did a Lion King medley, which was pretty sweet. I recognised the songs, but not the words. Fascinating. First prize in the Pete Cute Awards goes to the second years with their Bouken Tai skit. Saluting and modifying their voices and… Argh, it was so cute I could have died! Top marks for the kids who seem intent of skinning me alive the rest of the week.

Didn’t cry this time, but I did end up feeling quite melancholic. I don’t think it helped that all the other teachers filed off to have some sort of meeting, and all the parents shuffled away to their cars, and the kids were sent marching back to their classrooms. It was quite lonely, really. I wanted to talk about what I’d seen, too. I wanted to tell the kids they’d done themselves proud, too. But no, we hopped on the bus and went home. That was it.

I think this sort of thing typifies the ALT role for many of us. The real love of the job doesn’t come from school policies, meetings and formalistic staff relations. It comes from the kids. That’s why we do this job, isn’t it? Nothing makes me more proud than an enthusiastic use of English from a student. And in the music festival, it’s the kids’ performances that really shine. I’m not there to be treated like a guest of honour, because that’s not what I came to Japan for. Nor am I here to mingle with PTA members and overbearing parents. I’m here to teach kids. If it weren’t for money and stability, I wouldn’t need anyone else to do my job.

I lost track of where I was going with that. Haven’t had coffee in a while, so I think my brain’s overshooting itself. Let’s move on.

What next? The term is almost over now, and it’s been a bit of a long one. I think we’re all looking forward to a long break. A break that starts, if you can believe this, at 16.15 on Christmas Day. Yes, this year closing ceremony lands on Christmas. It’s a defiance of human rights, I tell you. Not that Steph and I are hanging around for that long. We’re off on Sunday. But it has felt like a long term, broken up by the odd massive, exhausting event.

Like English Festival! Gosh, I almost forgot! So, if you didn’t read this last year English Festival is a speech presentation (NOT a competition!) where kids from junior high schools meet up and give presentations about a given topic for the ALTs and teachers of other schools. This year’s topic was ‘mottainai’, which sort of means ‘waste’, I guess. Things like energy conservation, finishing your plate, reusing old clothes and things. My own school was taking part, and though it was definitely not a competition I was also on the board of judges to choose a particularly good speech. But it wasn’t a competition.

And here’s why. Alongside the public schools, we also have two international schools taking part, and a private school with a lot of kids who’ve lived overseas. And yet we are supposed to pick the most talented users of English from this bunch. A bunch that includes native speakers.

I’m not bitter. I think the Board of Ed made it very clear what the purpose of the Festival was. Not comparing talents, but celebrating what each kid is capable of. And also giving kids a chance to get together with other schools and have a laugh. And in those cases I think it worked out well. But it is hard, y’know? You want to pick the underdogs. You want to give them all an award.

In a way, I think my role as ALT rep gave me a bit of an easier job. I mean, I have to represent the ALT community with my choice. So it’s not gonna be the international schools, because I know a lot of us don’t exactly appreciate their participation in the contest. That isn’t a contest. So I was looking for the fun ones. The creative ones. And there were a lot of them, I’m pleased to report.

Unfortunately, those all got snapped up by other judges. I should have acted quicker. A lesson for next time. Jump in there, tread on some toes, say your peace. Piece. I don’t know. So the school I wanted to pick got taken by the Chief Superviser of the Board of Education, who I am pretty I am contractually bound to not argue with. Second choice was taken by a teacher from an international school. That left my third choice…

…which was my OWN school.

I haven’t had that faint-inducing panic in a long time. It was like walking into the staffroom to find that the new teacher sitting next to you is that one tough kid from high school who took offense at your smarts and Adonis-like good looks. Hello, there. Fancy seeing you. Remember when I said I never wanted to see you again? And the more times this thing creeps up on me, the worse it gets. Cos I feel the fear for my current situation tied up with latent, residual fear from the olden days. Let’s see if I can list them off. English Festival; standing in line at SeaTac without an ESTA form printed off and having the border inspection guy lean forward and go, “Excuse me?”; being told I was responsible for driving my coworkers to the venue when I hadn’t brought a car because this was the first I was hearing of it… I should stop. So this time I’m sitting there, losing the feeling in my fingers, wondering who will give the eulogy at
  my funeral after I’m lynched by ALTs. And possibly my principal.

Well, I’m still alive, so you can tell that didn’t happen. My kids were a bit bemused. The ALTs seemed to think it was funny. Well, most of them. The others will forget in time.

Unless I judge NEXT year too…

But enough about me, English Festival has never been so much fun. The MCs were on top form, the kids were excellent, I laughed like an idiot at the skits in between speeches. A great day, all in all. Minus the panic.

Not a massive amount left to talk about. We had Thanksgiving at our house again, and that was a lot of fun. And Halloween, too. I’d forgotten to mention that… I don’t remember a lot about that night. I remember the hangover, though. But Thanksgiving was wholesome fun. We even had a second one down on Port Island, and got to meet our friends’ new baby. Never held a baby before. He didn’t instantly hate me, and I didn’t drop him, so crisis averted. A guy could get used to it…

Less about that. Christmas is upon us, and the term is almost over. A couple more things to mention and then I’ll give you back your afternoons.

So, my first ever campaign of D&D is almost at an end. It was a short one, cos we didn’t have the Guide that tells me how to do my job properly. Still, I think it went well as a practice run if nothing else. Everyone seems to have enjoyed it. Nobody died. Everyone was severely injured enough to not get cocky about it. All hangs in the balance for tomorrow's dramatic conclusion… This Christmas I’m going to give that Guide a good read and come up with something a bit more open ended for the next campaign. It’ll be set some time after the events of the first one, so what happens tomorrow will determine the specifics. Everyone wants to be spellcasters. Maybe something about some kind of school of magic, with four houses… It’s a good chance to bring new players in. I’ll have a talk with everyone and see what the new group looks like.

Mekton is on hiatus because of baby, but that’s going quite well too. I’ve learned a lesson about control from that game. Giving everyone full access to whatever technology they wanted for their robots was a good chance to see what they want to make, but bad because there’s a million and one rules I now need to memorise. And also scale battles for. It’s honestly exhausting. I’ll give it some thought, there’s still a few weeks’ of stuff before the end of the second series, but I may have to end it come summer or something. Or maybe someone else will step in and run something else. Like D&D. Who knows?

Finished Mass Effect 2 again the other day. Garrus died, and broke my heart. He’s always been such a big part of all three games, it was like watching Han Solo get shot in the back or something. But I did love it too, in a sick sort of way. The tension of not knowing whose life hangs in the balance was quite exhilarating. Especially when I’d played through all their stories before, and liked them all. With the Christmas sales coming up, and an abominable amount of Steam credit in the bank, I’ll try 3 at some other time. Haven’t seen the reworked ending yet, so that’s exciting.

Had my birthday on Monday. Didn’t have class so took the day off. Played Pokemon all day with a Let’s Play of The Wolf Among Us in the background. I can’t believe he decided to take off Gren’s arm! He should know there’ll be consequences! I’m really loving Alpha Sapphire, especially the new DexNav thing. Makes hunting for rare Pokemon a bit more rewarding.

Yep, I’m out. Nothing else to say. A big thanks to everyone who wished me a happy birthday. As you can no doubt tell, I did indeed have one. Looking forward to visiting the colonies next week. Hope you all stay in touch.

That’s it from me for this year. Thanks for reading.

31 - Several months later... (Side One)

Oh hey, Pete, you do a blog?

Yes, it's been a long while. And that's something I start all these things with, but I don't think I've skipped a whole season before. So sorry, if this is the only way you've been keeping up with my life out here. Though if that is the case, go ahead and drop me an email because, as you see, this isn't a very reliable form of connection.

Let's start with summer. In a word, 'busy'. As ALT Advisor for Kobe City, a position I'm sure all the Yamans are sick of hearing about, the summer influx was one of the big responsibilities of the year. I mean, I wasn't the only member of the welcoming committee, not even the most involved member. There was a lot of great work being done by a lot of good people, and I was proud to be a member of such an ace team.

So here's the overview. Weeks of meetings to get things like schedules sorted to start, and then the Group As arrived. First day, paperwork and welcoming dinner at ours. Me 'n Steph enjoyed hosting, something I know she's always been keen to try but too chick-chick-chicken to put into effect until now. I'm going to be saying variations of this quite a bit, but the newcomers are all amazing. Well, they're not new anymore. I think to a man they've settled down now, and that's excellent too. Next day was an early start to the ward office for residence cards and proofs of residence. A bit of confusion here, as clearly the office had dropped a few memos down the drain or something. Still, a couple of phone calls and we were back on track. Afternoon was spent loafing around the phone shop getting phones. This was definitely not my area of focus, so there was a fair amount of just kicking our heels and keeping everyone entertained. Coffee was supplied, mercifully. Then back home for an early night. Then Friday, which started with a trip to the disaster museum. Don't get me wrong; the Hanshin-Awaji Earthquake is even today a huge part of Kobe's identity, and learning about it is very, very important. But still, I was not exactly put out to not have to go with everyone else. That afternoon we went to the city centre to take everyone on tours of important landmarks like stations, nice restaurants and the immigration office. Lots of walking, but not exactly taxing.

I think this is where the realisation started to hit me, that I was no longer novice but veteran. It was a nostalgia-filled summer, where every corner seemed to unearth unconsidered memories like toys recovered in a long put-off room cleaning. It's funny what sticks out. Walking across the overpass and being asked about the British love of tea, or losing a digital camera to water damage on the top floor of city hall. Things I haven't thought of for many years. Hm.

Moving on, that night was pub, followed by sleep. The weekend was just as busy, this time filled with unofficial trips out. We Yamans took everyone to the second-hand stores up in the north of the city on one day, and off in the other direction for the big electronics stores on the other. By this time I think we were all a bit washed out, but certain things (like air conditioners) are pretty essential during the summer. The nights were spent playing boardgames and drinking, usually at ours but increasingly at others'. Again, I consider myself truly privileged to be surrounded by such excellent people.

Monday now, and a trip to a, though not exactly convenient, certainly typical junior high school for seminars. Matt and I gave a bit of a hint session on self-intro lessons, and that was entertaining. Again, it really hit me that now we are the teachers. We're the ones with the advice to pass on. It's a hard to take it, honestly. Something I always have to fight with; that feeling of not having anything to offer. But I am fighting. And darn it, this summer I came out on top. Tuesday was the first day at school for the Group As, so we kicked back.

And then Wednesday came around again, and the Group Bs arrived. Rinse and repeat.

I don't have to say this, really, but everyone who came to Kobe this year is a remarkable human being, As and Bs, and even Cs. I enjoyed talking to you all about your new lives in Kobe, and I'm also happy to not really have to do that anymore. But I think a lot of us old-bies agree: last year we lost a lot of good men and women. The folk we were taught by. The folk who let us into their homes. That hit hard. And I'm glad that, though we don't have replacements for those gone home, we have something new, and something just as good.

Alright, back to summer. After the Bs came and did the welcoming thing, we had job training, two days of seminars about the more intricate sides of teaching in Kobe. I had another seminar to give, this time about remotivating yourself after years of monotonous drudgery. It was a daunting topic, but I think I got it. Or rather, I facilitaed the getting it of everyone who attended and essentially did my work for me. Cheers, guys. I do like a good KEC seminar day. Some days the place can be stuffy and oppressive, but it sure beats a day at school. I mean, it ends and you're already in town. You're near the pub. Heaven. And being with everyone else is a real good point, too. I can't say I've been thoroughly invested in every speech I've heard and every seminar I've taken, but I can say I learn a lot from 'em.

Last thing I want to talk about i-

END OF SIDE ONE