And
so, the summer holiday comes creeping to a close. I surprised myself
this morning by realising that I actually did enjoy this holiday
quite considerably, even though most of it was spent in a hot staff
room. Maybe it’s less that I enjoyed myself, and more that I’m
grieving the end of a relatively responsibility-free part of the
term. After this it’s back to making lessons, preparing materials
and so on, and all that suddenly feels like a whole lot of exhausting
work. And it is, why try to make it sound like something easy! It’s
hard, gruelling, emotionally draining work and I’m sad that I gotta
go back to that.
Having
said that, I’m still feeling the rush of teacherness that comes
from Summer School and Job Training. Thanks to everybody’s
fantastic ideas, I now feel like a real failure of a teacher, and
will be at least trying to try harder this term. None of the
kids have been writing me letters this year, and I need to try to
change that. I guess it doesn’t help that they all know me
exceedingly well at this point, and many of them even had my classes
in primary school. They got all the opportunity they needed to ask me
their million and one dumb questions like how big my shoes are, or
who my favourite One Piece character is, or what strategy I would
employ to defeat a level 50 Reshiram with the move Flare Drive. True
story.
Right
then, let’s start with Summer School. For the most part, the
two-day junior high school English event at Kobe’s University of
Foreign studies was identical to last year. I was in the same Speed
Dating room, which was relatively unchanged despite new management.
And in case you’ve forgotten, the name is a joke. Okay? I
don’t wanna have the comments box flooded with cheap jokes about
dating under-age Japanese kids. There were more kids this year than
last, almost double even, though none of them my own. Next year, I
will plug Summer School like a leaking tap at 3AM. But yeah, more
kids meant I was talking to two kids each rotation, five rotations
per session, four sessions per day, two days. Which means roughly
eighty of the two hundred fifty kids that I personally talked to.
Obviously, sometimes it was only one. And sometimes it was none at
all, owing to absentees. I really outdid myself in the advertising
department this year, I think. A vivid, eye-catching sign, photos to
spare, a massive England flag… Damn good effort, I say. And my
advertising was rewarded with the very first kid that I talked to, a
tall, slightly dorky looking young man whose name was Kanda. Before I
could even squeeze in a question to get the ball rolling he had
pointed a finger at my namecard and the many doodles thereon and
asked, slightly breathlessly, ‘Is that Kyubei?’ Our five minute
conversation dealt exclusively with anime. His favourite was Suzumiya
Haruhi, which I highly approved of. He’d seen Madoka, and thought
it was really excellent. Right now he was rewatching To Aru Majutsu
no Index on DVD. His favourite band was Jam Project, just like me,
and he passionately lamented the departure of female vocalist Rika
Matsumoto, better known as the voice of Satoshi from Pokemon.
In-credible. When five minutes were up, I was forced to watch him go
and be replaced by a pair of much shier girls who had much duller
interests like books or piano or something. I can’t even remember,
it was that dull. Compared to Kanda, at least. Fortunately, though I
didn’t know it at the time, it would not be the last time I saw the
young man. And when I did, he would be the biggest celebrity the JET
community has ever known.
The
morning progressed thusly. Talking with kids, eating a meagre lunch
(it was a diet day…) and resetting the room for the following day.
Then it was time for the speech contests. Now, I shall be brutally
honest and say that last year’s speeches were all okay, but we were
all well and truly tired of hearing about the Tohoku Earthquake by
the end. Yeah, it was ideal speech-making material, and yeah, it was
the biggest tragedy the nation of Japan has faced in many years. But
after watching however many speeches it was that dealt with the
earthquake, we were all emotionally sucked dry, and it was difficult
to appreciate each new one. This year, however, the speeches were
little short of absolute perfection. We had speeches about Japanese
festivals, towers, stories, the city of Kobe, animation, inter-racial
tensions (that one was a real sock knock-offer), traditional comedy
and Kanda.
Kanda,
you see, got up there and did a speech about Kanda. I.e. himself. And
I have not laughed so hard since I watched Scott Pilgrim on a raging
sugar high two years previous. He got up on stage and told the
audience that he was the student council president at his school, and
that it was well-deserved titled since he was easily the most
charming and best looking student in the whole school, who had won
the love and respect of teachers and the student body alike.
“Especially girls”. He then went on to talk about his greatest
passions in life, trains and anime, and in doing so talk about the
wondrous, divine joys of otaku culture, of which he was a deeply
passionate member. He talked about moe, that all-too complex
semi-sexual feeling of affection that so defines the otaku masses,
and danced the Hare Hare Yukai with such splendid vigour as I have
never seen in my entire life. Even by the original cast of Suzumiya
Haruhi. The highlight of the speech came when his assistant, who
though few in lines was still absolutely hilarious, suggested that
the greatest asset of a modern-day otaku was one’s money. “No!!”
shouted Kanda. “Your answer is dirty! And adult!” I
cried with laughter, as did we all. As did we all. Lamentably, Kanda
was not the winner of the first day’s speech. He ran over the time
limit, we were told, and his theme was a little all over the place.
Can’t argue with that, and he was up some stiff competition.
However, hopefully he went home realising that he had won the
greatest prize of all: the love and respect of the entire JET
community. And we cheered his name as he left the auditorium.
The
next day was fairly uneventful. I met some of Steph’s kids, who
were thrilled to meet their teacher’s boyfriend. They… had a
funny way of showing it, though. “Which do you like better,
Stephanie or fish and chips?” “Which do you like better,
Stephanie or Hatsune Miku?” “Is there anyone in this world that
you like more than Stephanie?” Trying to throw spanners in the
works of romance. As if they wanted us to break up, presumably so one
of them could snatch Steph away from me. Did I mention they
were all girls? Anyway, Speed Dating was fun, and the speeches were
superb. Easily a vast improvement over last year. Perhaps next year,
now with two years’ experience under my belt, I could run
the Speed Dating room… I’ll have to think about that. It’ll be
my final Summer School, I think, so I’d better set it off with a
bang.
Weeks
passed, and it was time for Job Training. Two days of sticky
classrooms and sweltering clothing, listening to lectures on the art
of the ALT. Just as with Summer School, this year’s Training was a
vast improvement over my first. The guys running it did a stellar
job, everything in its right place, and though each day I stumbled
home with my brains flat and minced I can’t say I didn’t enjoy
it. The big event for this year was the Activities Seminar, in which
we were all divided into groups of five and asked to make a 15 minute
activity for a given yeargroup. I shall publicly admit to being
nervous when I first read the team list, but as is always the case I
was proven dead wrong when we absolutely floored the
presentation on the second day. Nailed it. Stunning job. The
others weren’t bad either, though I did spend the whole rest of the
seminar filled to the brim with self-satisfaction. It was a little
distracting. In the evening of the second day a bunch of us went out
for a meal and a film, and I learnt that yes, it’s true, Britain is
the only nation in the world that queues properly. The film
was Prometheus, and despite training my Jaded trait to high levels
through gaining experience with horror video games, I still left the
theatre with shaking knees. I enjoyed it, don’t get me wrong,
though in the latter half you could almost hear the tinkling glass of
the windows on Scott’s shattered train of thought. Seriously, no
sense whatsoever. He’s a zombie now? Where did that squid get the
food to grow so big? Is Vickers a robot, she never answered?
And there was one scene that I could care to mention (though instead
I’ll care even more and not) that was just unnecessary. Though it
was the unequivocal pinnacle of that nightmarish climax (and it was
so much like a nightmare I did wonder if I’d fallen asleep for a
moment there) there is no cause for such a thing ever being
enlarged on a massive screen and played for the whims of thousands.
Plus Steph was ill (still is, actually) which properly freaked me out
on the way home.
That’s
about it for school events. This week at the school we’ve been
having meetings with the primary schools about how English has
progressed. The answer is a resounding ‘well’, though most of the
meeting was asking me what kind of holiday I’d had. Preparations
are underway for Sports Day, on the 22nd, which I’m
genuinely looking forward to. It was a great event last year, and
though there will be many scraped knees and passings out I’m pretty
sure it’ll all be worthwhile.
Now
for a bit of personal life. Game for this season is the Crysis
series. I didn’t quite finish the first one, it bugging out quite
terminally as soon as a lamp started swinging in a darkened room,
though I picked up enough of the plot from Warhead to have a crack at
2 this last week. I thought Crysis 1 looked good. What did I know?
Crysis 2 looks so good it almost looks too good. Reality isn’t
this vibrant, Crytek! Also, you can’t fire through brick walls in
real life, but that’s a different issue. I love the story, and the
settings, and the music. And I’m looking forward to doing more than
just scrape the surface in time. Also playing a ton of Lord of the
Rings Online lately. Introduced Steph to the frantic magic of the
Skirmish, though it’ll be a little while before she’s convinced.
Earned enough Turbine Points for a mask with ram horns on it, and
enough Marks for a pair of awesome platemail boots that are purely
cosmetic. Hit Level 27 just last night, surging my way through the
Lone Lands with my Herald of Hope. Steph bought a house, which my
Scholarly skills allow me to decorate, but only if she’s not
adverse to pea-green. Farmed more pipe-weed in twenty minutes than a
whole room of hobbits could smoke, not that pipe-weed has any
practical use in game. Roaringly good fun. Hoping to make good on my
‘don’t cry over the end of Summer, Petey’ present of the first
Project Diva game on PSP this weekend, as well as get a haircut. Oh,
and Fallen London is really good. The new updates have made it
impossible to play on my phone, which means all my lovely action
points are getting wasted away during the school day, but I am still
enjoying it. I died again yesterday, quite by accident, and that was
really annoying. It’s pretty easy to get yourself out of prison, or
insanity, but death? That one’s harder. The Grim Reaper totally
loads his dice. Soon as I get out it’ll be back on the trail of bat
monster with sentient teeth.
Been
writing quite a bit lately. Almost finished a short story (is it
still short if it’s a hundred fifty pages? I guess this is what
Stephen King grudgingly calls a ‘novella’) about dragons and
leprosy, which is turning out a bit grim for my liking but still
pretty good. Hoping to start something longer next, something with an
additional genre tagged on to the end of ‘fantasy’. I mean, it’s
all fantasy these days. I have a great world to work with, some great
characters to draw from, but if I’m gonna get myself properly proud
of my work I need to branch out as much as possible.
Aaaaand,
that’s it, I think. The rest of my summer, all written down for
you. Next week is back to work, marking the tests at the start of
term and then gradually getting more Christmassy as autumn passes us
by. Still hot, though, and I really hope this weather will get colder
by the time teaching begins properly. I don’t want to have to teach
in this nightmare…
Anyway,
that’s it. Thanks for reading.
No comments:
Post a Comment